Observing Communication

My observation took place at an early childhood school. I was able to observe a teacher talking with a group of students about families. The teacher was explaining that classmates and teachers and other peers within your school are also considered your family. The students the teacher was talking to refused to believe this could be true. The children said that teachers and classmates could not be your family because you are not blood related and because you do not give them kisses. The teacher tried to explain that is one component of what a family member may look like, but you can show love for others in many ways. The teacher also tried to make the connection that in a family you care about each other and want what’s best for each other, and to connect that this is what a teacher does for her students. The children continued to express that school members were not their family.

What I noticed throughout this observation is the children did not agree with what the teacher was trying to explain, and began to get defensive about what is considered to be their family. I also noticed that as the teacher was trying to give other examples of how school can also be your family, the teacher was getting frustrated, but also was unsuccessful at finding something the children could relate to. I learned that the children needed to understand the meaning of family in a different way, but also the way the information presented to them was perhaps something they never had considered before and needed an example. I learned that this conversation between the teacher and children needed to be extended over several different conversations and to be presented in a different way.

Throughout my observation it appeared that the teacher was trying to make connections to the children’s lives, however they did not appear to be meaningful connections and that may be why the children were not able to understand what the teacher was trying to explain. Rainer Dangei and Durden (2010) explain that topics being discussed in class are better reinforced when connected with something children may experience at home. In this situation, the teacher tried to connect it to home, but perhaps the examples should have been more specific examples. In addition to this, these authors explain that teachers must not make assumptions about the understanding of their students. As I reflect on this observation, the teacher may have assumed that the children understand what a family is and also that each child has the same type of family.  This conversation may have been more effective had the teacher asked the children their understanding of a family first, and then tried to extend the students thinking by providing questions that extend their thinking (Rainer Dangei & Durden, 2010).

I think this conversation could have made the children feel uncomfortable and feel that they had to defend their “family” and perhaps got the impression that the teacher was trying to replace their family. I would think talking to children and trying to express how their family can also be their school family would help children build a positive sense of self-worth because of the understanding of how they are important to many individuals. Derman- Sparks and Edwards (2010) explain that children need positive adults in their life to help them form a positive image of self, and I think this conversation about the meaning of family is a great step on helping children to develop positive self-worth.

I have learned that sometimes what you are trying to communicate is more difficult then you originally thought. In this observation, I believe this was the case and in order for this conversation to positively impact the children, the topic needed to be re-addressed at a later time. This has taught me the importance of listening to what children are expressing while also putting your own personal expectations of what you want to hear aside in order to truly gain an understanding of what the children are trying to share (Stephenson, 2009). When I communicate with children, I think I focus more on what I want to hear and not enough on what the children are sharing. Therefore, I would like to work on putting my feelings aside and listen closer to what my students are sharing to work around their understanding.  

 References

Derman- Sparks, L., & Edwards, J. O. (2010). Anti- bias education for young children and ourselves. Washington, DC: National Association for the Education of Young Children (NAEYC).

Rainer Dangei, J., & Durden, T.R. (2010). The nature of teacher talk during small group activities. YC Young Children, 65(1), 74-81.

Stephenson, A. (2009). Conversations with a 2-year-old. YC: Young Children, 64(2), 90-95.